Boss Your Business - The Podcast

Yvonne Heimann [00:00:00]:
Welcome to this episode of "Boss Your Business." Today, I am joined by the dynamic Gary Ware, a master of integrating playfulness into your workplace. Gary's journey from a burnt-out executive to a renowned trainer and facilitator is nothing short of inspiring. Discover how an improv class reignited his passion and led him to establish a career in helping organizations build better cultures through play. Get ready to explore the transformational power of play, the importance of breaking out of toxic productivity patterns, and practical tips to infuse creativity and efficiency into your daily routine. Tune in and join the playful rebellion – this episode promises to be both enlightening and fun!

Yvonne Heimann [00:00:56]:
So, Gary, tell me, how. How did you get here? Did little Gary think he is gonna bring play back into the workforce?

Gary Ware [00:01:06]:
To be honest, he did. However, I went on a path because I followed everyone else's playbook, everyone else's framework as. Yeah, as others can probably relate. Right, of, hey, you know, get a good job, check, you know, go to school, all those things. And I was lost if I was being completely honest with myself. And I was. I was an executive, I was a director. I had a lot of staff under me, and I was burning myself out.

Gary Ware [00:01:41]:
But I thought that's just what you do. Matter of fact, I would go to networking things and. And, hey, how are you doing? Oh, my God, I am so busy. Oh, blah, blah, blah. All of those things. Because I thought that was the badge of honor. That's how you validate that, your existence. And it wasn't until I took an improv class, matter of fact.

Gary Ware [00:02:02]:
Yeah. And it was so much fun. It re awoken me and brought that playfulness out of me. And I realized I'm like, I think I'm doing something wrong, you know, because the cool thing is, I would go back to work, you know, the next day, you know, after taking this, you know, improv class, we're. And maybe we'll get into this, maybe not. But we did these silly activities, but we. I was completely present. I, you know, and I wasn't thinking about my to do list or clients or anything like that.

Gary Ware [00:02:32]:
And then I would go back to work the next day, and the clients would still be the clients. The work will still be there. But I was. I, you know, I was focused. I was present. I was doing all of those things. And fast forward another ten years. I still didn't really get the point of like, hey, maybe you were meant to do something else.

Gary Ware [00:02:52]:
And, you know, the universe has its plans, and the plan that set me into the motion that put us in this conversation right here is, I was. I was a co founder of a digital marketing agency, and my business partner took the business and left. He basically said, hey, we should go our separate ways. You know, bought me out. It was a complete surprise for me. I was not expecting it whatsoever. And then I was shell shocked. I was like, oh, crap, what do I do now? I.

Gary Ware [00:03:25]:
Maybe, maybe not. I think I finally got the hint. Like, my sort of unconscious self got the hint. I think any normal person would have went and just got another job again, would have went and back to the job that was really good, the cush job before that, and say, hey, can I get my job back. But I took that as a moment to just rethink everything. And then I realized the thing that was bringing me the most passion, that was making me feel the most alive was when I was doing this work of lighting others up and bringing, you know, playing playfulness into the workplace. So I decided to hang a new shingle out, saying that I am a trainer, I am a facilitator. I do.

Gary Ware [00:04:08]:
You know, I do team building. And then I started working with. I started with marketing organizations because that's my background. And helping them, helping them bring better cultures to their team, helping them be more creative, helping them collaborate better, all of those things. And it has been almost seven years since the breakup. The breakup happened March 10 of 2018.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:35]:
Right before the crazy year.

Gary Ware [00:04:37]:
But, yeah, I know.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:39]:
I've had the fun of watching you facilitate some exercises. I think the first time I got to see you live was doing "Business For Good" here in San Diego.

Gary Ware [00:04:53]:
Oh, snap.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:55]:
Where I also got my signed copy of the playful rebellion.

Gary Ware [00:04:59]:
Yes.

Yvonne Heimann [00:05:00]:
I still need to get you my signed copy. I don't think I've given you a signed copy of my.

Gary Ware [00:05:04]:
I'm still waiting. Hello.

Yvonne Heimann [00:05:06]:
Oh, God. I'm getting called out live on my own podcast. That's Gary for you. We love him.

Gary Ware [00:05:12]:
It's all good.

Yvonne Heimann [00:05:13]:
But watching, I'm one of those people. I'm like, silent, silent disco, playing around, doing things that. That are perceived weird. I'm the proper one. I only. I only. I only sing in my shower. There's a reason for that.

Yvonne Heimann [00:05:33]:
But I do get. I totally get the idea of improv in general. For me, it's this. It's like a guided meditation, for that matter. You know how it's like, really getting this focus in every. Nothing else matters. For me, it's a couple of other things, but, yeah, following you, there was a time where you shared a lot of your improv classes when you were going. That's why I'm like, oh, I remember those days.

Yvonne Heimann [00:06:01]:
And then watching the exercises that you did and getting an idea of it, it was so inspiring to watch because it's not just. It's not as weird people, seriously. I'm like, even I do them, so it's not the whole silent disco, and you feel completely weird, but it also had so many different impacts. First of all, the interaction between people, the. The mindset shift that is happening between. Within those different exercises and between people, and it just comes easily and effortlessly. So it's like, damn.

Yvonne Heimann [00:06:46]:
So, question. How did you come about with this idea of play for rebellion and bringing play back into the workforce?

Gary Ware [00:06:55]:
Yes. So, as I mentioned, I was exploring improv, and I was in these classes, and I immediately start to see the connection between these activities that were helping us be better on stage, be able to think on our feet on stage, be able to collaborate with our scene partners to business. And so I started bringing these activities to my coworkers, you know, the people in my team. Before a stressful meeting with a client, we would do an activity to get us warmed up. On a Friday, we would do an activity that allowed us to bond and connect. And these were all improv thinking type activities. And I was the evangelist for improv. And most people, like, they looked at me like, no, like I said, you should take an improv class, because their perception was, you go to this class and they're going to make you stand up on a stage and say something funny.

Gary Ware [00:07:49]:
The fact of the matter is the, at least here in the US, the second biggest fear that people have to death, so is death. And public speaking. Public speaking is number two, and then spiders is, like, number three. So. And it makes sense. Like, if you're. If the biggest fear that everyone has is public speaking and their perception of an improv class is that you're going to have to get up in front of people and do something like that, why would anyone do it? And I have that same sort of perception.

Yvonne Heimann [00:08:18]:
I love thinking on my feet. I'm like, that's why I love life shows. It's like, you never know what's gonna happen, it's fun

Gary Ware [00:08:24]:
Of course. And that's why you're an amazing person that is excelling and doing things the opposite way. So, anyways, so I started, you know, realizing, all right, what are we doing? I broke it down. What is the essence of what we're doing? It's play. And then I brought that. I said, we all need to play more. I got more, like, negative pushback from play that I was for improv, they were like, no, time is money. We don't have time to play.

Gary Ware [00:08:48]:
And I. And I was like, oh. And I was asking them, like, so when I say play, what does that make you think of? And most people thought like, oh, it's childish, and. And we're goofing off. And again, as intelligent beings, if your definition of play is goofing off and. And slacking off and. And. And all those things, yeah.

Gary Ware [00:09:09]:
Why would you do it? And. And then I started to help people, you know, realize that, you know, what? You're just looking at through a narrow lens, we need to make it more broad. And so then I started helping people realize that play is equivalent to getting into the state of flow. And I said, don't you want to get into the state of flow? You know, don't you want to connect? Don't you want to be able to win uncertainty strikes? Be able to calm yourself, get the anxiousness away so that you can step into that and take big risks so that you can excel in your business and career. And they're like, oh, yeah, makes sense. So the reason why my book is called playful rebellion is that play and playfulness is the answer. However, because the way that we are wired, we need to rebel against that status quo.

Gary Ware [00:09:56]:
We need to rebel against that programming, that play is just a frivolous activity that just kids do rebel against the programming that we need to work ourselves to the grave if we want to be successful.

Yvonne Heimann [00:10:09]:
And how often do we have it? I'm like, especially in creative industries, where it's like, oh, my God, I need to get this done. I need to get this done. I need to get this done. And the more pressure you put yourself into it, and the more you are trying to get it done, and the more you're trying to be creative and the more you're trying to come up with something, the less anything is moving.

Gary Ware [00:10:29]:
You're absolutely right.

Yvonne Heimann [00:10:31]:
So it's like, yeah, mm hmm. But I get it. When I think of play, I'm like, there's only two plays. One play that's not appropriate for my podcast, and the other play is child's play. So I get the. I get the perception behind it. So do you think with the name playful rebellion, it has made it easier to get around that initial perception of play is just a waste of time?

Gary Ware [00:11:02]:
Yes and no. People are warming up to it, but there's still a lot of work to do. And so what I, you know, as someone that is empathetic, like myself, I like to meet people where they are, and I, you know, I look at myself as the evangelist of play, and I just, you know, ask them important questions, you know, of, like, I try to understand what's important to them, you know, is, and to most business professionals, people that, like, when excel in business, you know, what they care about is productivity. They care about revenue. They care about all of those things. And I'm with you. I'm the same way. You know, I want to, you know, work really hard and leave a legacy for my, you know, for my children.

Gary Ware [00:11:46]:
I want to make an impact in this world. And then this is where the research comes in, is that as humans, we do a very bad job of understanding when we need to take breaks.

Yvonne Heimann [00:11:59]:
And you tell the one that gets, when I get into, when I get into it, I'm like, breakfast, lunch? Wait a second. It's 04:00 in the afternoon. I haven't even eaten. I haven't walked, I haven't done. I'm one. And it's. It's not even so much a hustle culture. It's just I love what I do, and when I get into something, it's, where the heck did the time go? So I literally had to start forcing, forcing in apprentices to take time for me in the morning.

Gary Ware [00:12:32]:
Yes, exactly. And so this is the other thing, too, where. So the negative of, like, hustle and toxic culture and the people who are passionate, the extremes of both can be detrimental to our health. And so we need to put in things that allow us to rejuvenate. And that's where play comes in. Because if you think about when you're in a state of play and when you're having fun, you're more likely to take bold steps, you're more likely to experiment with new ideas. You're more likely to connect with others in a way that is true to you, which also, yes, this is all, like, sort of playfulness. And then also, when you're in that state, you're.

Gary Ware [00:13:15]:
You're able to focus. You're able to get into a state of flow. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi says, flow is when time passes like. Like this, when you're challenged just enough, and when you're, like, engaged in it. And think about a time when you were, like, playing, whether it's a board game, whether it's a sport, whether it's yoga, you know, movement, stuff like that, you're just in it, and time flies. Now, imagine if you can apply that to your business, apply that mindset to your business so it doesn't feel like forcing myself. And so it does require some reprogramming. And one of the things that, and especially people who run their own business, we need to get out of that whole thing that our output is directly related to, like, our value as a human, you know, it's challenging.

Gary Ware [00:14:04]:
Let's. Let's just be honest. Like, you know, I'll just, I'll just leave that right there.

Yvonne Heimann [00:14:08]:
Uh huh. Uh huh. Oh, yeah, yeah. I. Mm hmm. I don't even. Yeah. As anybody listening can tell, this is, this is one of the lessons I'm working on literally right now where it's like everything is always gonna up and flow.

Yvonne Heimann [00:14:26]:
We have a market. Things just happen. It is what it is, guys. Ladies, we have value no matter what we do, no matter what we put out, no matter what we deliver. Do we want to deliver the best? Yes. Are we going to have seasons where we have a shit ton of clients and then maybe some less? Yes. It doesn't change your value.

Gary Ware [00:14:51]:
Yep.

Yvonne Heimann [00:14:53]:
I said that for myself just as much for everybody listening. Damn.

Yvonne Heimann [00:14:58]:
Um, yeah, that was a reason I brought Gary onto the podcast. There was a reason for this. Now for everybody out there that might have gotten stuck into this whole, oh, my God, I gotta do, I gotta do, I gotta do, I gotta do. We, as we are caught up in the to do list, we are caught up in deadlines, we are caught up in all the things that we need to do, and that realize doesn't even have to be hustle culture. It doesn't even have to be a workaholic. But we got caught into this, in this rut of, oh, my God, I gotta do.

Gary Ware [00:15:31]:
Yes.

Yvonne Heimann [00:15:32]:
Do you maybe have an exercise for them or something that can help them get themselves easier out of this? Because I'm like, it's not always easy to just step away from the computer and go for a walk. I'm like, that's one of the things that I often do, just to get into a different situation, into a different environment. But not everybody can always just take 45 minutes out of their day and do something. But do you have something that my audience can use or do when I realize that I'm. That I'm so in doing that, it's not a good situation.

Gary Ware [00:16:10]:
So, first and foremost. So since you like systems, I got this just for you. We need to. We need to sort of set our future selves up for success, because you're absolutely right. When you're in it, when you're, like, stuck in it, it's hard to break out. Like, it's hard to see the painting from inside the frame, right?

Yvonne Heimann [00:16:30]:
Yep.

Gary Ware [00:16:31]:
So you need to realize what your, like, situations are. They're just patterns. So what is the pattern? You know, when I get into, like, this state, whether it's like I'm trying to hustle or I'm just passionate, I tend to overwork and I forget about things. So you have to set up. And this is from research from a gentleman named BJ Fogg. He comes from Stanford. He's the reason why you're addicted to your iPhone. Because all the people who created apps followed this method.

Gary Ware [00:17:00]:
And so what you have to do is you have to think about, all right, what is the situation? So it's a simple recipe. When x happens. So the condition, I will do x. So this is the action because it will make me feel blank. And that is the important thing because you, again, you have to realize what is like, what are the stakes? What is this, you know, going to do? And so, like, for example, you know, when I am reaching for the, you know, cup of coffee or after I finished an exhausting client call or whatever the case might be, I will do what, I will take ten minutes to stand up and just move around my office. Like, it doesn't have to be like this whole thing where you're spending 30, 45 minutes doing stuff. It can be ten minutes within ten minutes. If you are intentional about this, you will give your brain the neurochemicals that you need to jump back in and be able to passionately and productively get back to work.

Gary Ware [00:18:09]:
And so, um, you know, what are those things? So you need to set it up in advance. You need to follow this recipe. And then a lot of times I have it on a sticky so I can remember again.

Yvonne Heimann [00:18:19]:
Yeah, it's like I have, I have stickies all over the place. Just to not forget things.

Gary Ware [00:18:22]:
So what is the recipe? And start simple. Um, you know, after I blank, like, so after, you know, I finish, I know some people who are writing, you know, in the process of writing a book. You know, after I, after I finish 5000 words, I will stand up, put on my favorite song and dance for five minutes because it will make me feel exhilarated. And then, and then, so this is the thing. Once you have the recipe, you need to actually do it. And in the beginning there's going to be resistance. You're going to be resistance.

Gary Ware [00:18:56]:
That's why I said it needs to be something where it's close by. It doesn't require a lot of, like, you getting up and doing something. Because the less is called activation energy. If you can shorten the activation energy window, you're going to be more likely to do it. I had a client that wanted to play the guitar and I was like, how often do you play the guitar? Oh, hardly ever. And I was like, all right, where's the guitar? It's in my, it's in my study. Where is that in really, you're going.

Yvonne Heimann [00:19:20]:
To need ten minutes just to get the guitar out, to get up, get it out.

Gary Ware [00:19:25]:
And so what they did is they, they took the guitar out, they put it on a stand within arm's reach.

Yvonne Heimann [00:19:31]:
Yep.

Gary Ware [00:19:32]:
So when, you know, all they had to do is when they hit that marker, when that trigger happens, boom. They grab the guitar, they push back. They, you know, they. They play like, five minutes. They have everything right there. And then, all right, five minutes is up. Boom. All right, put the guitar back, shake it out.

Gary Ware [00:19:49]:
Probably go pee. Because you haven't peed, you know, drinks with some water. Because what we're essentially doing is we're breaking our pattern. And when we break the pattern, we come out of that hypnosis trance, and then we are actually like, oh, oh, all right, cool. I need to actually take care of myself. I need. There are some things I need to do. So anyways, that is the thing.

Gary Ware [00:20:08]:
And then here's the big, most important part. Once you do it, you need to celebrate. And that can be anything. Like, yeah, I did that. Or high five. And it seems silly. It seems so silly. But the research shows that the people who celebrate it are three times more likely to continue to do it.

Gary Ware [00:20:28]:
Why is that? You get dopamine. Dopamine is the neurochemical that tells you, hey, do more of this.

Yvonne Heimann [00:20:37]:
Yeah. And that's. That's one of the things where. Where I have been working on. And I love how you brought up a pattern. Gary knows me. I love systems, because a pattern is nothing else than our personal system and our habit on how we do things. And I lived it today

Yvonne Heimann [00:20:54]:
It's like today is a big recording day. Three podcasts, one YouTube video. And I purposefully scheduled it in a way that I record for, like, half an hour, including chatting and green room and all the things get everything done. And rather than jumping in, doing the next thing, I get up from my desk, I go out on my patio, I soak up some sun, I make sure I drink a little bit. I hang out. I might call a friend. It's literally just some time away from my office set, get an alarm, because I will miss the time. The moment that thing rings, ten minutes before the next recording is ready to go, I come back, I sit down, I make sure the ac is off, and we are back in it.

Yvonne Heimann [00:21:41]:
And that's how I have been able to literally record back to back to back today and not feel excited. I not feel excited, not feel exhausted, but actually excited. And I've gotten how much done today simply by taking 20 minutes, half an hour, go to potty break, make sure I got my water, just sit in the sun and relax, and then come back.

Gary Ware [00:22:08]:
Yes.

Yvonne Heimann [00:22:09]:
And it really can be that simple.

Gary Ware [00:22:11]:
It's that simple. Matter of fact, Microsoft did a study about this, and it was. Hold on, real quick. Let me see if I. Do I have it? Nope, I don't have it. So I'll just explain it to you. So, Microsoft, this happened during the pandemic when people were working from home, went from meeting to meetings to meetings. So they had their employees that were part of this study wear those, like EKG caps and stuff like that. And what, what ended up happening was the, the people that went from meeting to meeting to meeting to meeting to meeting, they ended up, by the fifth meeting, their brains were fried.

Gary Ware [00:22:52]:
And I found it. So I'm just going to put it right here on the slide so I can go like this. Hello.

Yvonne Heimann [00:22:58]:
Let me see for the ones recording, because we got video and audio.

Gary Ware [00:23:04]:
So I would describe. So what happened is, so if you're watching this and you can see the chart on my screen, there is a series of images on the top. That's the brain activity of the people who went from meeting to meeting to meeting to meeting to meeting without any breaks. By the fifth meeting, their brains were fried, like completely done. They're not capable of being focused. They're probably making more mistakes. But if you look at the bottom. So the, the experiment group, they are intelligent.

Gary Ware [00:23:35]:
They had systems in place so that after these meetings, they took a break. It didn't have to be that long. And they did exactly what was described. You know, stretch your legs, maybe get some sun, take a drink, and then went back. And from meeting to meeting to meeting. And matter of fact, by the last meeting, in some cases, their brain was even more charged than the first meeting. But the main thing is they went into each task, they went into each task completely focused, ready to do what they need to do, and they're able to be that much more productive. And so for people who want to make an impact, that want to get the most out of their business, that's what you need to do.

Gary Ware [00:24:14]:
Like, enough of the. Let me just power through. Really?

Yvonne Heimann [00:24:18]:
Why?

Gary Ware [00:24:19]:
Really?

Yvonne Heimann [00:24:19]:
No. And it's like, that's, I think that one right there is well applicable in so many different ways where, um, what that study just triggered in me was the idea of introvert and extrovert. I'm like, what's, what's the word that are both? Ambivert.

Gary Ware [00:24:40]:
Ambivert. Yeah. Yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:24:41]:
Where it's like I am recharged by groups of people, but I'm also just as much exhausted by them. And it's the, it's the finding, the balance between it. I'm like, I'm happy as can be today and as productive and efficient because I did that in and out, that full on, on camera recording with my guests having a freaking blast and then taking a step away and coming back when I remember days of recording YouTube videos where I'm like, I'm not feeling well. I don't want to do it. And I literally was talking with one of my coaches about this today, how I'm gonna change my scheduling. Similar to exactly this, where it's like, okay, I got my morning. I take care of myself. I have one podcast recording in the morning.

Yvonne Heimann [00:25:34]:
Because I love that people interaction. It fuels me. It gets me going. It's. It's a external accountability that I have to show up and then record a YouTube video after. My YouTube video was already scripted, I literally got everything done. I took 5, 10 minutes just to take a breather, got my setup done for a YouTube video, and it was the easiest recording in weeks, of course. And I'm like, cool. Got it.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:01]:
New pattern found. Let's do this. And that's where we're being playful. And doing these things really helps. You systemize yourself, because that's what it is. You are building new habits. You are building new ways of doing things. You build new patterns to be more efficient.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:23]:
And that's one of the reasons why I brought Gary on, because I love systemizing people. Even though my phrasing sounds a little bit more wonky than playful rebellion. Playful rebellion definitely sounds way more fun than systemizing people. I need to find a better wording for that one.

Gary Ware [00:26:39]:
It's all good. We got our own thing, but at the end of the day, we're trying to. We're trying to create an environment where we can do our best work, because we are human beings, not human doings.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:51]:
Yes, we are.

Gary Ware [00:26:53]:
And it's a mindset.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:54]:
Tell everybody, everybody that is ready to go join the playful rebellion and actually be efficient and have fun doing what you're doing and not running yourself to the ground with hustle BS. Where can they find you? Where can they connect to you?

Gary Ware [00:27:09]:
Yeah. Yes. You can go to my website, breakthroughplay.com. that's where you can see a link where you can get a copy of my book. If you're on the socials, hit me up @GaryWare on all of them. I will happily, happily chat with you about any of this. You know, if you're charged up and you want to learn more, hit me up. If you're triggered and you want to tell me about that, hit me up.

Gary Ware [00:27:32]:
Whatever it's all good. I'm so passionate about this stuff. And, and, yeah, I love it.

Yvonne Heimann [00:27:38]:
And you need, you need to find Gary's stage appearance because he is also playful on the stage. And that, that yet Jedi, that Jedi show up on stage was freaking amazing. Guys. Here's a call out for you guys. Go find on his instagram. Gary ware. Find on his instagram. I know he has it on his instagram.

Yvonne Heimann [00:28:00]:
Find the Jedi post when he was on stage. Post in there "you heard about him on the podcast" and I'll send you some slack.

Gary Ware [00:28:10]:
How about yes.

Yvonne Heimann [00:28:11]:
And with that, guys, ladies, you can find all the links straight up in the description. Let's make it easy for you to go find Gary and let's supercharge our playful rebellion. Gary, thank you so much for coming on.

Gary Ware [00:28:25]:
Thank you. Appreciate it.

Yvonne Heimann [00:28:26]:
Make sure you follow the podcast because you know it. I'll bring you the best guest and the most playful rebellions right in to your earbuds and onto your tv. I'll see you in the next episode. Bye, everybody. Bye.