Boss Your Business - The Podcast

Yvonne Heimann [00:00:01]:
How do you elevate your brand and dominate in front of the camera without sacrificing your sanity? Today, we delve into the challenges that many face—juggling multiple projects, staying confident on camera, and the struggle of managing daily tasks that consume valuable time. There’s the pressure of being constantly visible, the chaos of organizing tasks, and finding the right support system to keep everything running smoothly.
Joining me today to share her insights and solutions in our celebration episode number 80 is XayLi Barclay. XayLi is a camera confidence coach and has been instrumental in helping women find their voice and shine on camera. With a background that stretches from Trinidad to the heart of the personal branding world in America, she brings unique experiences and practical advice to today's episode.In this episode of Boss Your Business, we’ll discuss the importance of mindset, practical tips for managing projects, and the value of seeking support. Expect to hear strategies that will help you enhance your visibility, elevate your brand, and change your approach to both business and life.
And with that, XayLi, so welcome. I am so happy to have you on my podcast, the one, the only woman of video. I am so excited to have you. So we get to nod out today.

XayLi Barclay [00:01:21]:
Thank you for having me, Yvi.

Yvonne Heimann [00:01:23]:
And, guys, if you haven't heard about XayLi yet, first of all, you probably haven't done videos then yet, because XayLi, again, is the queen of video. XayLi, tell my audience, because I'm like, yeah, as much as I'm joking, we can't know everybody. I know we all work in our circles and sometimes there's just people that we haven't come across yet. For the ones in my audience that might just be starting out with video or simply haven't come across you yet, tell my audience, who are you and what do you do?

XayLi Barclay [00:01:58]:
Oh, sure. Hey, guys. I'm XayLi Barclay. I am a camera confidence coach. I am so passionate about helping women to find their voice and be visible. Like, amplify your brand on camera is what I'm all about. I love helping people learn how to build an audience and how to market and sell their products and services confidently and effortlessly. Effortlessly.

XayLi Barclay [00:02:23]:
That's really what I love doing.

Yvonne Heimann [00:02:27]:
And that's what you're doing amazingly. Now, before we dive into all of that, did little XayLi think she's ever gonna be like this upfront in camera? I know you regularly have a microphone in front of you or a camera. Did little XayLi think, that's gonna be her life?

XayLi Barclay [00:02:45]:
Maybe when I turned around seven, I felt like I had a conversation with God where I clearly heard him say, if you want what you really desire, you can't wait for it. Like, no successful person is waiting for it, so you have to position yourself for it. And as a little girl living in the Caribbean, I didn't know how. I felt like America was success, so I had to get from Trinidad to America, and I did that. You know, it took a few years, but I did. I think I came at first when I was 15, and then I started, like, staying, you know, coming on vacation. Cause my mom was in the US and so, yeah, I would come and leave and come and leave. And I moved officially when I was 17 years old.

XayLi Barclay [00:03:36]:
So I did my SATs in Trinidad. I got a scholarship to go to school in New York City, and I did that. So at seven, I had gotten that download already and. Yeah, so, yes.

Yvonne Heimann [00:03:50]:
And it's like, just. Just looking at those. Yeah, pretty much ten years from 7 till 17 of cool. This is. This is what I'm gonna do and I'm just gonna make it happen. I'm like, you. You pretty much were born an entrepreneur where it's like, okay, this. This is where I'm going, let's just do it.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:10]:
And I'm like, I've. I've heard a little bit of your stories and all the things that talk to. To come where you are today. We all know life. Life always decides. I'm like, you know what? Let's. Let's do a little turn here and a little turn there.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:28]:
So it's been really interesting following your story and from. From that 17 year old XayLi, what happened to get to today to have your own business? You just launched. For anybody that's watching the video not listening, you just launched, I think, like, a couple of months ago. It's been.

XayLi Barclay [00:04:50]:
Yeah, end of March, yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:55]:
Your confidence cards.

Yvonne Heimann [00:04:56]:
Just again, helping women, helping people in general be more confident on camera. And I actually, when I got ready for us to go on video, I had the cards literally in reach right with me. I love those because it's like, even. Even for somebody like me that is on camera regularly, we have days where it's like, I don't want to.

XayLi Barclay [00:05:22]:
Yeah, literally. I use my cards every single day. Like, you know, it's. It is a product, but I use it every single day. So even though I'm on camera all the time, there are times I have to remind myself of my worth, of my value. You're doing different things all the time. You know, some projects are harder than some. You know, some are more nerve wracking than some.

XayLi Barclay [00:05:44]:
Like, you know, when you're launching, you need to be in a certain mindset, like, you know, so for me, I use them all the time.

Yvonne Heimann [00:05:52]:
What are some of the things that either have shifted or exercises or processes that you have done to. To help you and your mindset? I'm like, putting yourself out there. Like, you are being on camera. It opens you up to all the good and the bad that's out there. And even just as being an entrepreneur in general is a journey in itself, what do you do to help with those. With those waves and those seasons that being public and business brings with it?

XayLi Barclay [00:06:32]:
Yeah, I think even, like, as a kid, I remember there was a point where I read every library, library book in the library, and I was like, so, like, what's next? You know, there's nothing else. I've read all the books, like. Cause I went to private school in Trinidad, so our library was tiny, and I had gone through all of the books. I mean, it was sizable, but I went through all of the books there. But there are some books by an author called Enid Blyton that I used to read as a kid, and she's an english author, and her books were always layered with self help. And, like, you know, even though they were children's books, there was always, like, you know, the kids would turn over a new leaf for the summer and, you know, like, things like, you always want to be a better person, or if you knew you were being naughty, like you knew you wanted to change your ways, or. And so just starting as a kid, reading those kinds of lessons in stories, and getting so, like, you know, interested in things like becoming a better version of yourself and developing specific mindsets for hard things.

XayLi Barclay [00:07:46]:
And as I grew, I continued, like, seeking self help and mindset work. And, you know, that's something that it's ingrained in me today. Or even if we sit and have a conversation, I'm gonna make you believe that you can accomplish anything you put your mind to, because it's literally what I've done all my life, right? So I think for me, it has. It's a muscle that's very strong now because I've been practicing just becoming better, a better version of myself as I've grown and developed. But in business, it's something that is so foundational. Like, your lack of mindset is going to keep you from your next level if you don't become aware of it. So I think becoming aware of it is really, really important. And practicing things like journaling, meditation, my affirmations, like things like those for me, are no brainers.

XayLi Barclay [00:08:44]:
There are things that if I'm feeling under the weather, I have to ask myself, when last did you work out? What have you been eating? Have you been processing your thoughts by writing them down? How much time are you spending on social media not being present or outside of your own world? And so thinking about those things definitely helped to put me back on the right side, but also being intentional about what I'm listening to. Like, we forget that, you know, your brain is also a muscle that needs to be exercised. And if you are not taking in something that is good for you, for example, for me, my alarm, I use Alexa. I'm not going to say her name because she's going to wake up.

Yvonne Heimann [00:09:35]:
I changed her name so this doesn't happen.

XayLi Barclay [00:09:36]:
Oh, that's a good idea. So she wakes me up every morning, but to a meditation. So when I give my brain enough time to think about something negative, that's when I have a worst day. But if I wake up to something already happening, my brain then absorbs the energy from whatever is playing in that moment. And I did that because I found myself waking up and scrolling. And so if you scroll and the first thing that you see is that you're not enough, you're gonna go through your full day thinking, I'm not enough. Or beating yourself up for not having something or not reaching a specific accomplishment or not having what Janine has over there, you know? So I want to be in control of, especially in the morning or when your brain is in a place where it goes from sleep. I can't remember the state of the brain, but when you're getting out of sleep into being awake, that's the most important time of the day.

XayLi Barclay [00:10:39]:
And so needing to maximize that, things like that bring me back to being my best in business and on camera.

Yvonne Heimann [00:10:47]:
And it's like the reason why I was like, oh, my God. Is because I catch myself in that same thing and not even just the scrolling on social media, I fairly easily realize that when I go down a rabbit hole, when research ends up just hurting me and I'm like, just put it away. You're done. Also tv where just. Just some stupid drama show for all I care. Where I know it's not real, where I know it's staged yet still, if I watch too much of it, I find myself going down this rabbit hole of the whole world is bad. There is enough things that we can do better, and we are all working on making the people and our surroundings better. But if, like, when I watch certain tv shows, it's like everything is just black.

Yvonne Heimann [00:11:43]:
Everything is just bad. And I'm like, I will not watch it because I just don't want that. I want to believe that people are good, and especially the people around me. And that's why I was like, yep, that was my lesson last week. I went down one of those rabbit holes again, and I'm like, oh, my God, here we go again. But that's where. Where the realization comes in, where it's like, cool. Fell back into an old habit, asking the questions, as you said.

Yvonne Heimann [00:12:14]:
Did I fuel my body right? Did I eat the right things? Did I hydrate? Did I move? Did I do the things? No. Then let's get back on and let's do the thing again. And it's just. It's. It's a muscle, as you said. It's. Yeah, not every day is going to be great. You're gonna have a day where I don't leave the couch, and I'm just feeling sorry for myself.

Yvonne Heimann [00:12:35]:
And I give myself the time to just wallow for a day. And guess what? Tomorrow morning, I'm back at it. And I think similar things also happen in our business. Now. You have a lot of things going on. You have your own YouTube channel. I think there's actually multiple YouTube channels.

XayLi Barclay [00:12:57]:
I used to, but now I'm focusing on one.

Yvonne Heimann [00:13:01]:
See? Seasons, seasons. You got. You are working with Thinkific. I know summit going on. I know you have a lot of things going on in your life. How do you. And I do not like the word balancing, but how do you make it all work? How do you work through seasons? How do you train that business muscle? What's happening on that side of things?

XayLi Barclay [00:13:27]:
Yeah, I mean, it's. It's a lot. And honestly, like, I wish I could tell you, Yvi, it's all organized and I have it all together. That is definitely not the answer I'm gonna give.

Yvonne Heimann [00:13:39]:
And that's why I have you on the show. Because I'm, like, heck, I teach systems, and my stuff isn't perfect. None of us are.

XayLi Barclay [00:13:47]:
Exactly. Yeah. Like, no, I'm definitely. I don't. I don't. If I were to say it's all figured out, I would be lying. So. Yeah, I'm too authentic for that, to be honest.

XayLi Barclay [00:14:02]:
But, yeah, no, it's not all figured out. But what I do is I've learned to show up and kill it. You know, like, no matter what it is, understand the energy that needs to go towards it and show up and kill it. The second thing is support. So, because I'm so focused on showing up and killing whatever it is that I have my fingers in, I also need my support system. And so when I say that, I mean that things still need to be running in the background so that I can focus on showing up and killing it. Right. So when I say that, I might mean I might be traveling to speak somewhere or I might be doing a sponsorship for a brand that I'm working with, or I might be teaching a masterclass, or we might be launching something on the back end.

XayLi Barclay [00:14:54]:
There's always so much going on. And the way my brain works, I need to be able to focus on whatever it is that I'm doing until it's done, and then I can focus on something else. And so when I was alone in my business doing that, and I didn't have support, you know, taking care of other things that are happening, like inboxes, answering someone, whatever it is. I would struggle and I had to be really honest with myself and put systems in place and put support in place. And also just remember that I deserve to be supported. Right? Like that. That's something that I repeat every so often, like, I deserve to be supported. And when I started thinking about it like that, things started falling into place and I was able to show up and kill the things that I needed to focus on because, listen, you have to have those things in place for things to run smoothly or you're just going to be frustrated all the time, and we don't want that.

Yvonne Heimann [00:15:56]:
That's one of the things I loved with. With you leading up to this interview, because I'm like, I've. I've known you for quite a while. We've chatted constantly on Instagram, on and off, pretty much for years now. When it came down to business, it was. XayLi told me, hey, can you email right here? My assistant is going to take care of that. And I'm like, fuck yes, girl. Hell yeah.

XayLi Barclay [00:16:25]:
Yeah. Yeah. I'm in my inbox a lot, but if it's something that I know that I don't have the capacity for and I really want it to happen, I have to trust myself to hand it off. And so she's in my inbox all the time. I think it's one of the first things that she does in the morning because, you know, people will ask for me to do something, or sometimes brands reach out in the inbox, or sometimes people reach out to work with me. And I know that if I try to handle this, it's not gonna happen. So she's gonna come in and she's gonna comb through all the things and support me in that way. So.

XayLi Barclay [00:17:06]:
Because I'm usually talking to you on Instagram, I needed to tell you that so that we could be here today. Right. Because if it was up to me, it wouldn't happen. So, yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:17:21]:
I love it because of, like, to me, perfect. She's got a system for that. And, yeah, heck yeah. I'm like, I know I have assistance in different areas in my business right now. I do not have an executive assistant. Right hand, whatever you want to call it at that point. And I was like, yeah, that. That is on my list because probably not at the level you are getting it.

Yvonne Heimann [00:17:48]:
But considering even just the emails that I'm getting with my tiny YouTube channel with brands reaching out and the time I'm spending on looking at, is this even valid? Do I want to do this? Do I not?

XayLi Barclay [00:18:02]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:18:03]:
There's so much time that goes into, into admin stuff where I'm not in my genius, I'm not where I'm fulfilled, I'm not where my, where my power and my energy is best spend, and that's just where I'm at right now. But I know exactly that by end of this year, beginning of next, that's the next position I'm going to be filling. Because why?

XayLi Barclay [00:18:29]:
I got to the point where I was afraid of my inbox. And when I hired her, I think almost three years ago, I had to tell her, like, I need a bully. Like, someone that can say no. Like, you know, like. And so she was like, are you sure? And I was like, yes. People will try. Like, they'll email one inbox and, you know, they'll pass around and email another. And she's like, I just answered you over here.

XayLi Barclay [00:19:00]:
The answer is still the same. So, yeah, my inbox was, it overwhelmed me. It made me really anxious. And so even today, I saw someone say they're addicted to their emails. And I remember a past version of myself that was like, that I would be in there refreshing it. And now I don't know what's going on in my inbox, so. And it helps me focus on the things that I really do care about doing, like, creating content and, you know, preparing for programs and creating products and thinking about campaigns and getting excited about YouTube and going live, like, I need to be focused on things that are moving the business forward versus things that are a $10 task that someone else can do.

Yvonne Heimann [00:20:02]:
Oh, my God, I did. I joined James Wedmore's The Rise Of The Digital CEO the other day. And we know what he's teaching. We know what he's teaching. It's. We are speaking the same language, right? But he brought up one thing where I was like, oh, my God, he did the math. So if we were working full time, that's what, 2080 hours a year? So now do the math. How much do you want to, how much do you actually need to minimum make? And now you are spending, what, an hour and something that's just a $10 an hour task.

Yvonne Heimann [00:20:33]:
So rather than you paying somebody $10, you are actually paying, what, $150 and $175, maybe even $350 an hour that you could be making somewhere else just to do this. BS like why? Literally, like, following the math that way. And it's like, we have the understanding, right. It was just another way of looking at it where I'm like, the next hire is an assistant.

XayLi Barclay [00:21:01]:
Yes, you will, like, literally you deserve to be supported.

Yvonne Heimann [00:21:07]:
And I think that's another piece for us as women in business. I don't know you, but it's like, it's been a lot of work for me to step into this. I don't have to do it all myself. I don't have to have all the answers. I don't have to do it all myself. I get to ask for help. Holy cannoli. That was a growth spurt.

XayLi Barclay [00:21:30]:
Yeah, it is. It is. And you, do you, like, it's hard to conceptualize, first of all, for the people that are multi passionate, or you think that no one else can do it better than you. They can. They can't. Somebody else will do it and give it back to you. And you look at it like, oh, my gosh. Wow.

XayLi Barclay [00:22:05]:
Now, don't get me wrong. When you are going through the process, there are going to be, you know, because, listen, I've hired and fired a lot of people, but, you know, you're going to go through assistant. Like, before I found my assistant. Now, I went through a few people. Well, like, there was even a time where I had an assistant, an OBM, and even that. What? It was a mess. Like, so you're gonna have to.

Yvonne Heimann [00:22:29]:
I'm only laughing over here because I feel you. I think we've all done that.

XayLi Barclay [00:22:34]:
Yeah, I had an OBM and an assistant working with me, and it was still a mess. So you really have to find the person that is right for you or right to work with you. Right. Another thing that has helped me a lot, being that type of person, like, I got it. You know, I can do it all kind of thing is finding someone that you can really teach to do things the way that you like it. Right? So, of course they have to be skilled, because I've had people that I hired, and they didn't know anything, but finding someone that they're very capable, they can do it, and then teaching them the way that you like things done, or my assistant is very good at that. Like, I'll make. I'll point something out, and she'll be like.

XayLi Barclay [00:23:26]:
And I will never have to mention it again. Like, everything moving forward, she'll make sure to note, I like xyz this way. And so her being willing to learn from me and the way that I do things has been so helpful for our relationship, because I'm really aware of that. Although sometimes I forget to share, like, hey, I want to see this in this way. But, you know.

Yvonne Heimann [00:23:48]:
Oh, yeah, by the way, I just thought that, but forgot to tell you. Done that one, too.

XayLi Barclay [00:24:04]:
Exactly. I forget all the time. But that is also connected to, oh, maybe I'll just tweak it myself or fix it myself. When I've learned that it's just best to tell her so moving forward, she can. For example, if there's something on a landing page and I fix it myself, it's better for me to tell her so that moving forward, she will do it in that way versus me thinking, I have five minutes, I could just fix this easily. Right? And then next time it's done again and again. Exactly.

Yvonne Heimann [00:24:28]:
Now I've done. I've done an in between when with my content manager, when I work on new things, when, when we change things up a little bit on how. How we framework things or whatever. What I often do is an in between where I'm like, okay, here's what you did. I just spent 15 minutes polishing, figuring out what I want. Because sometimes it's me just figuring out what I actually want and I need to do it. And then I'm, like, talking through where my thoughts are, why I often give a why so that they can make the connections in the future, too. And then I'm like, so he.

Yvonne Heimann [00:25:09]:
My brain is finally making sense on why I want it different and how I want it different.

XayLi Barclay [00:25:13]:
Yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:25:14]:
Here's the result.

XayLi Barclay [00:25:15]:
Yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:25:16]:
We can adjust for the future. So it's like, it's just, again, as you said, paying attention to what's happening and adjusting accordingly.

XayLi Barclay [00:25:27]:
Yeah. Or even using a loom while you update it, like, doing it, you know, on video and talking it through, like it's a tutorial. That's so helpful, too.

Yvonne Heimann [00:25:38]:
You know, like, and it's like, it's great with me when I have team members, when I explain, I over explain often. Here's why and how and where and how and what and all the things and having people that can take all of that and concise it down into this is what she actually said. It took her ten minutes, but within 30 seconds. Here's what matters.

XayLi Barclay [00:26:03]:
Yeah.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:04]:
That's where. Where I have found. Yes, I'm looking for skill, too, but I'm looking more at the personality. You need the base skills. I can teach the rest. But what's your personality? Literally, I know everything. I'm not going to. I'm not going to be able to teach you how.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:23]:
I would like to have things that detail oriented that you mentioned with, with your assistant, where it's like, I don't have to tell you five times.

XayLi Barclay [00:26:35]:
Yes

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:36]:
Then repeat again another ten times. Oh, my God, that is invaluable.

Yvonne Heimann [00:26:46]:
Tell me what's, what's in the future for XayLi? Confidence cards, brave on video. All the things.

XayLi Barclay [00:26:52]:
So many exciting things. Working with more companies so that they're also able to share the beauty of the cards with their audiences. As long as there is alignment. We are reopening the brave on video membership, which I'm so excited about because we're going to be able to serve people on a deeper level. We've been building that system on the back end. We're also launching an app to go along with the cards. There's so much happening. I'm like, oh, my gosh.

XayLi Barclay [00:27:24]:
So that's what I'm really looking forward to right now. We recently also revamped our community. We're moving off of Facebook and into more of emails so that I can let you know and send you an exclusive invite when I'm live so that we have more intimate sessions on Zoom. I feel like I'm so excited about that because we're going to be doing networking and having, like, breakout rooms and all that jazz. So, yeah, that's really, really what, what's next? I am. My goal is to help women to dominate the camera and be visible so that they can elevate their earnings, their offerings, and just the way that they show up and deliver on camera, that is my real goal. I want to help more women show up and make more money by elevating their personal brands so that they can just change their life.

XayLi Barclay [00:28:21]:
Or not only their life, but the lives of others as well. That's my goal.

Yvonne Heimann [00:28:25]:
Because, you know, if we change one woman's life, she is going to change other women's lives.

XayLi Barclay [00:28:31]:
Hello, yes!

Yvonne Heimann [00:28:32]:
We know that.

XayLi Barclay [00:28:33]:
Yes.

Yvonne Heimann [00:28:34]:
And now you know why I constantly stalk daily on Instagram when I see a story of you, pop, what is she up to? There's one of the few. I've been cleaning up my, my feed and all the things, as we talked earlier, of really deciding what gets into my everyday life. You're definitely one that will never.

XayLi Barclay [00:29:08]:
I never take that for granted. Like, people send me messages about that all the time. Like, listen, I have everybody muted but your content. And I'm like, that is such a blessing. I really appreciate that.

Yvonne Heimann [00:29:12]:
Because it's, it's all of it, it's educational, it's fun. It's you. I'm like, when we started talking, I popped into your Instagram messages. I don't even, I don't even know how we cross path. I think Stephanie Lu probably.

XayLi Barclay [00:29:27]:
I think so.

Yvonne Heimann [00:29:28]:
Maybe yeah, right before I moved to San Diego. And it's like, oh, my God, I'm actually talking to XayLi in Instagram. It's her.

XayLi Barclay [00:28:13]:
People ask me that all the time. They're like, you're. Oh, my gosh. You responded. I'm like, yes, I'm a person.

Yvonne Heimann [00:29:37]:
And it's you and the stories. It's you on podcasts. It's. It's just you, period.

XayLi Barclay [00:30:54]:
Thank you, Yvi. I appreciate you.

Yvonne Heimann [00:29:56]:
And I cannot wait. Once I'm in Austin, I will make the drive up, and we're gonna go grab some good food.

XayLi Barclay [00:30:03]:
Oh, that sounds good.

Yvonne Heimann [00:30:05]:
Well, we're gonna do the extroverted introvert thing, and then.

XayLi Barclay [00:30:08]:
Okay, we could do that.

Yvonne Heimann [00:30:10]:
Then I'll leave everybody that's ready to go show up. Go show up even more. Go dominate your brand on video. I know you have some video prompt goodies for my audience to help with all of that. And then where can people find you? Where can people get the cards? Where can they go stalk you in a good way? People in a good way. We only stalk for educational purposes.

XayLi Barclay [00:30:39]:
Yes, I am @XayLiBarclay everywhere. I'm always on Instagram. Like Yvi says, I'm always in the DM's. I'm always connecting with people in the there. It's one of my favorite ways to spend time, actually just learning more about people, asking questions. I love learning about my people. You can find the camera confidence cards at cameraconfidencecards.com, so that's www.cameraconfidencecards.com.

XayLi Barclay [00:31:04]:
they are such a delight to have with you along your journey. If you are looking to become more confident. Thank you, Yvi. And make more money as you, you go along your online business journey. And, yeah, I can't. Reach out. Connect with me. I'd love to connect with you.

Yvonne Heimann [00:31:25]:
And with that, guys, you know, there is always all the links are going to be in the short description so you easily can just click on it and go follow XayLi. Lady, thank you so much for coming. Thank you so much for making the time. I am so excited to have you today. Thank you.

XayLi Barclay [00:31:45]:
Of course, I appreciate you for having me. Thank you for having me on your awesome podcast.

Yvonne Heimann [00:31:50]:
Bye, everybody. Bye.